My First Love

We had landed. Our new family of three, after flying over 20 hours around the world, had arrived in Madagascar. It was a bit emotional for me looking out the tiny plane window. This was our new home and even from my limited view it appeared very different than I had imagined.

As ridiculous as it may sound, somehow I thought that hundreds of nationals would be standing there to greet us overwhelmed with gratitude that we had come to share the Good News with them. Surprisingly, this was not the case. Within the first 24 hours on the ground, I came to the stark realization that I was not able to communicate enough to purchase water...much less share the gospel presentation.

I recall standing in the bathroom, staring into the mirror, and totally losing it. Seventy-two hours in and I had already completely lost sight of my first Love. I had the innate ability to have somehow made this calling all about me and not about Him in a simple plane ride across the ocean. It was in that moment that I knew I could go no further. This life was not about me; this calling not even possible without Him. My focus had to change.

Grateful that He allows us to come as we are to Him, I confessed my warped view of my current situation. I asked for His forgiveness, and although there were still many practical things to change, I immediately felt His presence and peace. He reminded me almost audibly that I was called to love. Called to love Him, my family, the people He had around me—not to save them—simply to love them.

Who is He calling you to love today?

Nickolee Roberts is a wife, momma, blogger, kindergarten teacher, and former international missionary, saved by His grace and believing that God will be glorified.​

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